I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
why do cheetos always look like penises
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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