I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
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