u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Is This New Dating App Elitist…Or Genius?
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.