sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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