just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
We got so high we made milksteak
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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