Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
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