Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
Randomize
