she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
I party with great urgency now.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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