So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Randomize
