I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Randomize
