I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
Randomize