I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Randomize
