So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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