you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
Randomize
