When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
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