just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
