I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
I need help removing her.
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
Randomize
