In all seriousness though I just found out the dog pissed in my bed it'd be nice to crash somewhere other than my couch while my piss soaked bedding is in the washer
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Randomize
