Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
