Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
The uberlube is also flammable
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
