I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Randomize
