HIV tests are more positive than that guy
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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