But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
well I can't set my house on fire every night
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
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