fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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