There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
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