Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
fuck your aforementioned shoe
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
Randomize