Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
