She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
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