Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
Randomize
