Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
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