he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
