just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
Randomize
