I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Randomize