Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
i need an iv and a liver transplant
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
