what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Randomize
