it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
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