Texts From Last Night

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  (847): View more from Illinois

  Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?

  (708): View more from Illinois

  We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.

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  (847): Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday? (708): We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us. http://tfl.nu/9z48
  Replies (47) Good night (14202) Bad night (1159)
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  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"

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  (920): i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism" http://tfl.nu/6eew
  Replies (13) Good night (4482) Bad night (1045)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c

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  (330): just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c http://tfl.nu/s239
  Replies (5) Good night (3241) Bad night (828)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.

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  (908): Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got. http://tfl.nu/yeqj
  Replies (12) Good night (1319) Bad night (4095)
• Favorite

  (316): View more from Kansas

  I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"

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  (316): I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex" http://tfl.nu/rqj6
  Replies (16) Good night (6325) Bad night (1089)
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  (425): View more from Washington

  all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.

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  (425): all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help. http://tfl.nu/bkkn
  Replies (6) Good night (3635) Bad night (1038)
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  (425): View more from Washington

  Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming

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  (425): Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming http://tfl.nu/1h5t
  Replies (4) Good night (3100) Bad night (899)
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts

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  (978): Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts http://tfl.nu/t2mu
  Replies (6) Good night (3069) Bad night (1170)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.

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  (+44): The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself. http://tfl.nu/y3oz
  Replies (4) Good night (899) Bad night (2117)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.

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  (603): All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident. http://tfl.nu/iw55
  Replies (7) Good night (3030) Bad night (893)
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  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.

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  (262): Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning. http://tfl.nu/3fkk
  Replies (5) Good night (1638) Bad night (936)
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN

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  (603): YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN http://tfl.nu/ns4x
  Replies (16) Good night (1845) Bad night (1268)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.

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  (410): It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole. http://tfl.nu/8vko
  Replies (16) Good night (757) Bad night (2182)
• Favorite

  (949): View more from California

  the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?

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  (949): the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real? http://tfl.nu/2sta
  Replies (2) Good night (1748) Bad night (350)
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  (518): View more from New York

  I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"

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  (518): I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories" http://tfl.nu/in2x
  Replies (5) Good night (601) Bad night (338)

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