so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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