I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
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