I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
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