Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Randomize
