Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
Randomize