just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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