Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
Randomize
