I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
We have so much sex to catch up on
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
