What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
When did we convert life to cartoon?
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
