I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
Randomize
