i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
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