I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
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