how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Randomize
