alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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